After Lucy’s vintage sitcom career dried up and the cost of American labor ballooned to roughly one Tesla per lunch break, she found herself outsourced in reverse—shipped to a Chinese iPhone factory as part of a last-ditch diplomatic stunt in the tariff wars. The idea was simple: America would “donate” one nostalgic national treasure in lieu of paying import duties. Now, surrounded by baffled Foxconn workers, Lucy spends her days stuffing microchips into her blouse like they’re chocolates on a conveyor belt, trying to unionize in Mandarin while the U.S. and China play economic ping-pong with the global supply chain.

If you’re looking for a thick, structured tee that’s also super soft and breathable—look no further! The unisex garment-dyed heavyweight t-shirt ticks all the boxes and is made of 100% ring-spun cotton. The regular t-shirt style will complement most looks and fit you to a tee.

• 100% ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 6.1 oz/yd² (206.8 g/m²)
• Garment-dyed
• Relaxed fit
• 7/8″ double-needle topstitched collar
• Twill-taped neck and shoulders for extra durability
• Double-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems
• Blank product sourced from Honduras

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!